Yom Hazikaron - Israeli Memorial Day

The day feels so heavy. So much more meaning to me having DB in the Israeli army.
It's real.
But then I think, he's not mine. G-d gave him to me. G-d is taking care of him and all his friends and all the men and women who are working to keep us safe and fight off the evil in the world.
And then I think, there is so much evil in the world.
So much sadness. So much real life. Death and birth. And loss. And wondering when will it all be over?
It's a hard one this year. As DB gets closer to his actual service. I wonder, what should I pray for?
Who am I to ask of G-d? It's been His plan since the day he allowed me to become pregnant with my little boy. And then He used me as His messenger to raise an honest, respectful, strong and kind man. DB will always be a part of me, but he is not mine.

That is how I feel.
It's an emotional day.