Wednesday check-in

I woke up this morning at 4:30 am with a migraine that felt like my head was about to explode.

I couldn’t move – I tried everything.

I knew I had two couples to meet at the clinic this afternoon. I couldn’t cancel on them. So I pushed myself out the door, wishing I could just leave my head at home to stop pounding while I went on with my day.

Playing martyr paid off. By the time I was done meeting with couple #1, the headache was almost gone.

When couple #2 never showed up (this was to be their third session to which they showed up for none of them!), I realized the headache was gone. I wrote them down as “self-terminated” and left the office.

The best part about working in a clinic is that I don’t have to take the no-shows as a personal insult. I get assigned clients for the 3 hours I work. I take whomever the supervisor of the clinic gives me.

This was my first time working with a couple. It’ll take some time to figure out my own style, but it will come. I officially start my internship at the Family Clinic on Sept. 1.

Ari and I went into Mea Shearim to buy a shofar and bag for a bar mitzvah gift for a good friend, we then went into town for dinner. It was the first time we had said more than 3 sentences to each other all week.

I have decided, for the record, that I will not compete against his computer for attention! When he’s ready to give it to me, I’ll be happy to take it… (An after thought for those of you who will call me and tell me I should not write such things: I know that was a little side vent, but I’m keeping it in, thank you!)

The annual International Arts & Crafts Fair began tonight in Sultan’s Pool below the Old City walls. The last several years they have had it on Ben Yehuda Street in the city center for security reasons. This year it was back to the huge field with hundreds of amazing artists showing off their stuff. Security-wise, I didn’t see or feel such a huge difference, but Sultan’s Pool is much more spacious and fairground-like venue.

I love LOVE A&C fairs! I never buy anything, though. Why buy what you can make yourself?! Even though I never make the stuff. I appreciate the creativity and talent of different people from all over the world! I love the feeling of being amonst such artsy, fun, and creative people!

I didn’t feel guilty about being out and enjoying myself, because I feel I have to live. If everyone went down to Gush Katif, who would be left here to do the important things that need to be done here? I feel the heaviness, I feel the pain, but I cannot put myself in it and get stuck.

What I could not enjoy, and I thought it was unnecessary, were the very loud and colorful fireworks that were shot off and lit the sky above the Old City walls. THAT I could have done without…

So we had our date, Ari and I, and I appreciated the attention and time! We actaully relaxed and enjoyed walking around. Ari travels again next week, so this was our connection time before I single parent again…

Tomorrow I pray to wake up headache free, enjoy my morning water aerobics class and then take the girls to the pool for an all-girl’s swim day.

Can’t forget to bake a cake for DB. Ari will take it too him at camp before Shabbat.

I’ll try to check in again before Shabbat – no promises!

How is it that I share a 16 year old son with the same man I have been married to for 17 years?! Reality check...