Monday, October 29, 2007

A 42,000 + question

I wasn't going to ask one this time because I didn't have a good question to ask.

But as I was preparing for my art therapy class tonight, I found a great question in my notes.

Think about this one. And leave me a comment. It's a goody (At least I think so):


I've been thinking about it. Not sure how I'd answer? How about you?

Go Dog Go

Ely read the book to me tonight. Cover to cover.

It's about time! She's in second grade!

Very exciting...

Wanted to share the news with you ;)

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Early morning writing

I’m not walking this morning. I have walked every morning this week and need a break. What I really want to do is go back to sleep, but can’t do that. Too much noise outside – still construction going on. And once my head is up, there’s no turning it off!

I woke up from a crazy dream this morning. Couldn’t get it to go away. Tried “Happy thoughts” but it didn’t work. Some kind of fighting. Like real violence fighting. Ari was in it. And others I can’t place now. They planned fights. I just hid. Weird! Very weird! And scary. And disturbing.

My belly is really speaking to me this week. Saw my new holistic doctor yesterday. I am convinced that my belly problems are 90% caused by emotional stuff. Which just aggravates me more because I have nothing to have emotional stuff about. I have a great life.

But it’s like I have a bug that won’t go away. An emotional bug, that keeps the negative thoughts and feelings there. And won’t go away. I fight them – I really do, but they are obviously there on an unconscious level. And so I continue to have belly pain and discomfort – constantly.

I am off most sugar (which means I cheat minimally), no dairy, no wheat, no combining protein and carbs together, no drinking during my meals, and a lot of other random “no more eats”. And still I have the pain. Mornings are the worst – like now.
So I know it has to do with emotions…


I worry. I have anxiety about things being “just right.” I care a lot about people. I fret. I get angry at injustice. I have to be responsible – all the time. I hold it all in my belly.

Maybe my dream was about the fight I have in my belly to be well? Far-fetched? Maybe.

Have a good day.

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

Anybody there?

I'm wondering if anyone reads these things anymore.

Since Facebook came out.

I know I haven't written in awhile, but I still wonder if anyone still comes by to check.

Just in case you do, here's a quick SarahbSmile update (in quicktime):

- started teaching. Students want me to only speak English. When I try hebrew it gets too confusing for them. OY!
- starting an ulpan for mental health professionals. That should help!
- busy finally taking care of children health issues. nothing horrible - just check ups and follow ups
- On a new food program. no wheat, sugar (the hardest), dairy, no proteins and carbs together, and more. Doing the best I can. Lost 4 kilo. Feeling better too!
- DB back to yeshiva. Have to remind him to call his mother. He seems happy.
- MB training for ALYN. Go to to sponsor her or Ari. Busy with school
- NED got 100% on a math test. Amazing start to 10th grade. Great attitude!
- Ely is completely front toothless. Working hard in school. Gymnastics and started piano. Just plunking right now.
- Need to visit family. On waiting list for December - otherwise January, for sure.

Lots of thoughts. Haven't written about them though. I should.

Anyone there?