Soulja Boy

When DB calls me, my phone rings Soulja Boy Crank Dat (Google it, if you have never heard the song). It's really a very inappropriate song in it's lyrics, but it's got a great beat and the title gets me. Except every time my phone rings to that song, I panic!
Tonight DB called at about 8:30 PM.
"Guess where I am Imma?"
I hate that question!
"In the hospital?" Why shouldn't that be my first guess?
"No Imma, I'm in the Ben Shemen forest down the road. My commander said you could come visit."

Drop everything and go. That's the life of an IDF mom!

DB didn't know exactly where he was. "Somewhere in the forest. Abba for sure knows where we are. He rides his bike here all the time."

We drove around in the dark with ELy crying "I'm scared" from the back seat. He didn't know where he was and we weren't sure where to find him.

We found him, and the rest of his unit. As we drove up, there was only one bright light lit by generator and a large fire. I could only see young men, most without their shirts on, with their guns strapped around them. In the fire were four "POYKE POTS." A Poyke pot is a huge rod iron pot with a lid that is put in the fire. In the pot is carrots onions potatoes, sweet potatoes and chicken. Add water. Add chili sauce and honey. Last 20 minutes add rice. Stew. Cholent.

I brought cookies, which the boys devoured!!

There we were in the woods, boys sleeping around us on mattresses n the middle of the forest, waiting for their stew to be done. In the middle of the forest, these young men - boys - soldiers. there to learn how to live.

I couldn't follow too much of the conversations -- frustrating.

DB was happy to see us and of course so were we. He told us about his week. Lots of all night hiking/ navigation.

Tired boys.

Surreal moments.

How I know when someone might not like me

It's a feeling.
A very strong feeling.
It's the way she looks at me.
It's the way she speaks to me.
Or tolerates my presence.

Maybe I intimidate her. Or threaten her.

It's the look. Or the exasperation.

The vibes are there.

From the beginning it's been like that.

I don't think I did anything. I try to be nice. Look her in the eye. Smile. Engage.

I was in the room for a few minutes before I said hello - I was talking to someone else. That seemed to upset her. I didn't acknowledge her right away. Maybe I should have?

Otherwise, it seems as if my mere existence makes her grumpy.

I upset her when I speak. Ask questions. She argues almost everything I say. Defensive.

Threaten? maybe? But why? How?

Do I really have to process it with her? What did I do?

Why can't she just like me?

Geesh!

The Good News, The Bad News and the Bad News in the Good News

That's how he said it to me when he called on Friday:

"Hi Imma! How are you Imma? I've got good news and bad news and bad news in the good news.

The good news, sort of, is that we were just told that we have the week off this week. The bad news is that I have to stay in for Shabbat because I got in trouble for falling asleep during guard duty.

The bad news in the good news is that I probably won't be home now for Rosh Hashana or Sukkot. Don't know for sure yet, but I doubt it.

So I'll be home on Saturday night and will probably go up north with the guys on Sunday and Monday. Tuesday we're going to have a BBQ, maybe at our house.

You and I can hang out on Wednesday and Thursday. K?"

Thanks DB.

Grandma says this is a good way for me to prepare to be a mother in law.

I have no say. I don't have a choice. I can have an opinion, but so what. You don't belong to me anymore. Someone else is your boss, they get to say when you come and go. And I have no more control over how much time you spend with me.

I can try to accept it, but I'm not going to like it for a very long time!

Reality? I'd prefer a little more fantasy right now...

Sigh

MY first day of 4th and 12th grade!

It's not just NED and ELY starting school today. I start school also.

I have to study for the tests and make sure the homework gets done.

I have to make sure to wake up on time for the bus.

I have to make sure healthy lunches are packed.

I have to be sure to be respectful to the teachers when they say and do ridiculous, not fair things!

I have to cover the books and buy the supplies needed.

I have to meet with the teachers and listen to them.

I have to try to understand the subjects or make sure I find someone who can help.

I have to be positive and try my hardest too!!

I have to advocate for myself.

Yep - I'm starting school today too!